Let me lay my cards on the table. Despite some assuming I am a Daily Mail-reading, Tory-loving capitalist, let me prick that bubble: I am as far to the left as you can be without being insane. I lack any religious conviction, I’ve worked for government and charities, and I love baby kittens.

That doesn’t make me a lesbian either. I’ve even taken drugs and inhaled (for any police reading it was in a licensed café in Amsterdam, honest). I also have a degree. So before you rage at what comes next, just remember – I am not what you think.

‘Feminist’ is becoming a disgusting, negative term I do not wish to be associated with. It’s heading right up there with ‘racist’.

I fully appreciate the roots of the movement, to seek equality and freedom from oppression. The Rights of Women was an eye opener to me at University, and I understood the historical background it grew out of. What I can no longer stand is women bitching and whining for equality, and then spouting judgmental lectures on what that should mean without any consideration for the root of the movement.

Equality and freedom means any woman can be whomever she wants. Right? Wrong. Don’t demean yourself, don’t be a trophy wife, don’t change your body, blah blah blah. Feminism is now just an excuse to bitch about those different from yourself, and female jealousy is frequently masked in articles by an allusion to feminist rhetoric.

The prevarication of supposed feminist writers is fast becoming a joke we are now all tainted with. Pick on an easy target, say something right-on with no balance, make every woman with a brain look like an idiot.

Let me give you an example. Last year the Guardian published an article about how the coverage at Wimbledon was “anti-feminist”. All those camera shots of the players’ girlfriends; the comments on the Ladies Singles winner. This went into a rant about how these women were merely trophy wives, waiting to trap a man, as well as calling for the BBC to remove commentators who make sexist comments.

Now hold on a sec. Let me consider my experience of the competition. Let’s see, there were a lot of men in shorts, a huge amount of risqué photos of Nadal and Murray in the mags, Andy Murray’s unpolished mother in every other shot, and masses of camera shots of Bradley Cooper and Gerard Butler. I bet if you look at Twitter, a lot of women were tweeting about that.

Well how dare you, women of the world. All this equality has brought you suggestive pictures of athletes and lingering shots of Hollywood hunks. You all disgust me.

Well no, actually you don’t. You see equality is about everyone getting the same options – free will means you choose what you do with them. Did you cover your eyes as a player changed his shirt? No? Well the rules said you should so no moral high ground for you.

So women want to do Page 3, or porn, or beauty pageants. Let them. As long as it’s their choice, so what? No one questions a man becoming a stripper, or going into porn, and heaven forbid you question a gay man entering Mr Gay UK. Some girls want to marry a footballer; good luck to them. Some want a career – brilliant, just don’t bitch and demand positive discrimination. Like women trying to change an alcoholic or falling in love with a serial killer, there are some things that will just never work. No matter what gender or persuasion, some people are just cunts.

My plea is for women everywhere to stop throwing the word ‘feminism’ at anything that winds them up, without thinking whether it really is a balanced point of view. You’ve pretty much destroyed the meaning of the movement; to me and many women it is now a negative word. I’m an ‘equalicist’. Same rights for everyone. Talk about persecution, rape in war, genital mutilation, anywhere where equality really is needed. Whether Kate Middleton should dye her grey hair, or keep true to feminism by keeping it real? No comparison really, is there?

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