I have a burning pet hate these days. I become so infuriated I’m sure I often resemble a ‘gammon’ myself as my face turns a shade of beetroot, my blood pressure skyrockets and I struggle to maintain my cool and dignity. I absolutely detest arrogance, especially when the so-called achievements are exaggerated or didn’t even happen.
So many Brits believe they are better than any other nationality, and living anywhere other than the UK is akin to living in North Korea or some third-world country in Africa. I really can’t comprehend where this arrogance comes from and I have no tolerance for people who think and behave like us Brits walk on water and look down on all other nationalities from our ivory tower. I’m beginning to think we’ve become a nation of complete twats, convinced we are far superior to the rest of the world and that our tiny little island exceeds any other place on the planet.
The ironic thing about people with these attitudes is the fact most of them have barely travelled or lived outside of their own postcode and have no substance to base their beliefs on whatsoever. To them, the Isle of Wight is a foreign destination.
Over the years I’ve endured conversations with complete imbeciles who think the NHS is the best free healthcare system in the world. Trust me, it’s not. In fact the NHS is ranked 18th place by independent studies and comes well below par in comparison to the free healthcare systems in Germany, Switzerland, France and Spain to name but a few. But you try and explain that to many Brits and you will get a tirade of total nonsense as they look at you like you’ve sniffed glue and still have the tube attached to your nostrils. The number of Brits that believe free healthcare doesn’t exist anywhere other than in the UK is astounding. Their ignorance about the rest of the planet and how other countries function would be funny if it wasn’t so tragic.
And don’t get me started on Brits that genuinely believe we won the war single-handedly. Brave little Britain and our soldiers fighting with grit and determination against the Nazis, saving Europe completely unaided. The other day I was chatting in a forum on ‘the Face’ and mentioned to some knuckle-dragger that over a quarter of RAF pilots who participated in the Battle Of Britain included 9,000 Polish air personnel and thousands more came from Czechoslovakia, Belgium and France. On came his caps lock as he started ‘shouting’ and informed me I should learn my country’s history and stop spreading fake news. I mean, what the actual fuck? He seriously believed only the Brits and others from the ‘British Empire’ fought in the Battle of Britain. I couldn’t even muster the energy to send him some links informing him of his own ignorance. What’s the point? You can’t educate pork as my Nan used to say. I think I turned my fury inward as I spent the next few hours scowling at everything and everyone.
This leads me on to another infuriating concept. The Great British Empire. The Brits who believe we can survive alone without being a member of the EU seem to think we still have an Empire, not just a useless rock awash with aggressive little monkeys and a tiny island thousands of miles away full of waddling penguins. What the fuck are we supposed to do with those?
I suppose we could eat the penguins and monkeys should the economy drop quicker than Boris Johnson’s trousers after Brexit, and we can no longer afford to eat. Brexit is the exact proof of the nation’s arrogance if you ask me. What nationality other than the deluded Brits would still think, three years on, after all the proof they’ve heard that Brexit will destroy the economy and make everyone poorer, to vote Tory to ensure it happens? Leave supporters are so convinced of the UK’s superiority nothing can convince them the country simply can’t survive on its own. I seriously feel like I want to smack these people around the chops with a wet kipper and shake them into reality.
I’m inclined to think mainstream media shoulders a lot of responsibility for manipulating so many Brits into believing all this bullshit. Let’s take ‘The Sun’ for example. The only use this newspaper has in my opinion is as a substitute bog roll when the Andrex has run out. I struggle to understand why anyone with an IQ of 50 or above would read this shit, let alone believe what they are reading. Some of the outright lies and exaggerated ‘news’ this rag publishes defies belief.
The Sun has been dumbing down the nation for over 40 years and it’s done a bloody good job so far. I’m sure if their front page told their readers Boris Johnson was actually the love child of Prince Philip the fuckwits would believe it and demand he be called His Royal Highness from this day forth. If you ply gullible individuals with propaganda and fake news for long enough, eventually they will take everything they read as gospel, no matter how absurd or untrue the information happens to be. Yet Sun readers are the biggest culprits for being legends in their own heads.
I despair at times, really I do. Sometimes I think I should just live in a cave without any internet or social interaction of any kind, just for the sake of my own sanity and to prevent possible heart attacks. Then again, if I did that I’m sure the bats sharing my dwelling would also become a target of my fury after a while…